112 - Avoid Weight Loss Blanket Statements
Your weight loss blanket statements might be keeping you stuck, but all that’s required is a little introspection. So, we’re guiding you through a process of questioning these stories so you don’t get caught in the trap of self-sabotage and can instead get into a groove of determining your next best steps.
It’s New Year’s Eve, and if you’re here listening, it probably means you’re ready to go all-out on your health and weight goals. But if you want to finally alter the course of your weight loss journey and stop driving yourself crazy on the cusp of a new year, we have to look at your weight loss blanket statements.
We all have mental drama that our brains offer us any time it perceives an obstacle. Our brains love blowing things out of proportion, but believing the lie that you’ll never be able to lose weight, or that you just can’t figure out what works for you is keeping you plateaued and stalled, so let’s investigate your stories.
If this is resonating, I have good news for you this week. Your weight loss blanket statements might be keeping you stuck, but all that’s required is a little introspection. So, we’re guiding you through a process of questioning these stories so you don’t get caught in the trap of self-sabotage and can instead get into a groove of determining your next best steps.
The doors to Vibe Club are currently open only for a few more days! If you want to get in on my New Year’s Challenge where I help you build the life-changing skill of not stopping, you have to join us. Doors close on Monday, January 3rd, 2022 and won’t be opening again until April, so I hope to see you there!
What You’ll Learn from this Episode:
- Examples of common weight loss blanket statements.
- Why we need more varied data points on our weight loss journey.
- How to investigate and question your weight loss blanket statements.
- Why weight loss is a mental game.
- What I would have done if I didn’t question my weight loss blanket statements.
- The solution to weight loss blanket statements.
Listen to the Full Episode:
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- 111 - Stop Stopping in 2022: Join My New Year's Challenge
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Full Episode Transcript:
Hi, I’m Maggie. I’ve lost a combined 90 pounds after having my two kids and struggling with postpartum depression and anxiety. I teach you how to lose weight a different way, how to fix the thoughts in your head holding you back from finally taking weight loss off your to do list. Losing weight doesn’t need to be a struggle. And it’s my mission to help you love the process all the way down the scale. If you’re ready to lose weight a different way then let’s get it.
Ryan: Happy New Year almost.
Maggie: New Year’s Eve.
Ryan: New Year’s Eve.
Maggie: You know what I’m going to be doing on this day?
Ryan: Tell me.
Maggie: Going to bed at 7:55pm.
Ryan: Like you do every New Year’s Eve.
Maggie: New Year’s is my favorite holiday.
Ryan: Yeah, I don’t stay up till midnight ever anymore.
Maggie: Ever, ever.
Ryan: I used to all the time.
Maggie: When was the last time? He used to stay up way past midnight.
Ryan: Yeah, I just don’t do that anymore. I’m an adult. I feel like that’s a thing teenagers do.
Maggie: It is, I mean you were doing it well into your 20s, but yeah. Yeah, well, into your 20s, maybe till you were 28, 29.
Ryan: Yeah. Real quick, it’s New Year’s Eve, a lot of people celebrate. It’s considered a holiday today. You’re going to eat some stuff, you’re going to drink some stuff and then what are you going to do tomorrow?
Maggie: Are you going to be hungover tomorrow?
Maggie: Plan for that. Let’s start with that.
Ryan: Let’s drink some water, drink some electrolytes.
Maggie: Yeah, maybe have some breakfast.
Ryan: Yeah, pre-game with water and electrolytes.
Maggie: Post-game, yeah.
Ryan: And then afterwards, post-game it with water and electrolytes.
Maggie: Midnight game it with more electrolytes.
Ryan: Yeah. And then it’s going to be January 1st tomorrow.
Maggie: Yeah, that’s amazing. I feel goolie about the new year.
Ryan: Yeah, of course.
Maggie: I do.
Ryan: Okay. I just had to get that off my chest.
Maggie: Happy New Year, guys.
Ryan: Happy New Year.
Maggie: Let’s have a great 2022. If you listened to our podcast last week you know that we’re legit going to be doing some different stuff in 2022.
Ryan: Well, Vibe Club is probably still open at this point.
Maggie: Is it?
Maggie: You tell me, you’ve got the dates.
Ryan: Yeah, it’s December 31st.
Maggie: Yeah, yeah, yeah. It’s going to be open until?
Ryan: I don’t know. Probably the 3rd or 4th. Well, I mean just follow Maggie on social media and you’ll know.
Maggie: Yeah, I’ll let you guys know when [crosstalk].
Ryan: But do you want to briefly, I know we discussed this last week but give them the rundown.
Maggie: Yeah. We’re going to be doing a new year’s challenge and it’s not going to be like the normal challenges you’re used to. What I’m going to do is I’m going to challenge your challenge thoughts to be honest. Here’s the thing, I ran a couple of challenges in 2021, way back in 2021. And I noticed that people’s challenge bullshit really came up. And I don’t love the way I reacted to the second challenge because I just thought, people – the perfectionism really comes to a head when people are doing a challenge. And so I didn’t do another challenge after the July one.
And I don’t like the vibe of challenges. And then I realized, no, we’re going to do challenges. I am going to be doing challenges this year. And I’m going to challenge your challengeable shit. I’m going to challenge your perfection. That’s the best thing that I can do for you, guys, me ducking out because you don’t like challenges, because you quit on yourself. No, we’re not doing that in 2022. So the goal and the focus of this challenge is going to be to stop stopping. We’re going to stop stopping in 2022.
What does that mean? It means that the thing that’s preventing you from figuring this shit out is that you keep stopping. We’re going to stop doing that. So that’s what’s going to be the focus. Obviously, the goal is going to be to get you going on creating a plan that’s perfect for you, that you can follow, that feels sustainable, that feels juicy to you, that’s going to be the goal. But the bigger goal is going to be that commitment that you’re not going to stop at any point in this month. That doesn’t mean that you’re perfect, I have to clarify that so much.
It doesn’t mean that you followed your plan perfectly every day. It doesn’t mean that you did everything right. It means that if you had an off day where you didn’t make your plan, you wake up the next day and you make a plan, or you go three days. On the fourth day you get up and you make a plan. We’re not stopping. We’re going to keep going. You’re going to know that you put in effort from the beginning of the month all the way until the end of the month. It’s not a perfectionism contest. It’s a keep going contest.
It’s a keep going challenge, the better you can get at consistency, aka not stopping, the quicker you will lose your weight. Don’t you guys want it to get to the point where it feels easy? It’s so hard when you keep stopping. What came to the mind was a…
Maggie: A lawnmower, just imagine that every stop you’ve got to get that…
Ryan: And it’s a shitty engine too.
Maggie: I can just see in my mind, I have never mowed a lawn, I’ll be honest with you guys, but Ryan has. And I remember when you’d have a shitty lawnmower, I’d watch him out there getting things going. And he would be just be just cranking it and cranking it. And I knew he was going to get it on. I had no doubt that you were going to get things going. But the fact that it was off and the fact that it needed to be revamped any time you took the grass out and stuff. That’s a lot of effort to start again.
Ryan: The more time that you allow yourself to have stopped the harder it is to get that lawnmower started again.
Maggie: And you’re making it harder for yourself by stopping.
Ryan: And can you define stopping?
Maggie: Stopping means I’m not making my plans. I’m not checking in. I don’t give a shit if I’m full. I don’t give a shit if I’m hungry. I don’t care about this. I don’t want to worry about this. Things are fine, we’ll just cruise. I don’t know. We’ll start on Monday. It’s all your bullshit, it’s every single thought that you think that makes you not do the things that you need to be doing. The things that you want to be doing, the things that you told yourself you were going to choose to do.
All that bullshit that stands in the way between you and making your plan, you and following your plan, you waiting until you’re hungry before you put food in your mouth. You deciding not to lick your plate clean when you’ve clearly had enough. All the stuff that you want to be doing, what’s standing in your way are all of the many stops, all the little micro stops, the little, my plan is good in my head. One weekend won’t matter. All of those are micro stops. And then you get a little bit bigger of the stops, where it’s days or whatever.
But a lot of people, they’ll start a challenge, and they will stop on the 9th, they’ll stop. And they won’t do shit until February 1st starts. So they are full stop, not micro stop, full stop.
Ryan: And let’s just clarify, stopping is not eating off plan.
Maggie: No, stopping is quitting.
Ryan: Most people think that is.
Maggie: Yeah, I know. And that’s why I’m doing a challenge, even though you guys don’t have great challenge mentalities, you don’t. There’s the thing where it’s like if I didn’t do it all 31 days I failed. And it’s, no, if you stopped you failed.
Ryan: You know what I hate about typical diet challenges?
Ryan: Is that you are essentially deciding to put yourself into some type of framework that implies it’s temporary. It’s terrible.
Maggie: Yeah. I’m doing it for this many days.
Maggie: Yeah. Whereas this challenge is going to set you up literally for the rest of the year.
Ryan: No, for the rest of your life.
Maggie: Rest of your life, as soon as that came out of my mouth I was like, no, it’s not for the rest of the year. It’s not so that you can get a boost on your weight loss in January. No, it’s so that we can start the process of you being done with this shit forever, of you being able to trust yourself around food, to moderate carbs, to be able to follow through and do what you say you’re going to do. No, no, we’re not doing challenges the way that we normally do them. And we’re going to deal with all of the ways that you micro stop.
And the commitment is going to be that we’re not doing a full stop at any point this month. We are not waiting for a Monday, a new week, or a new month, or a new year to start over again because that is making it harder on us. That is making us have to put in 10 times the amount of effort. How many messages have I got where people are like – I got one just last night. Best tips when you’ve been off keto for two months. There is no tip. There is no special tip. The tip is start and stop stopping.
Now that you’ve been stopped for two months it’s going to feel a little difficult to start. Why? Because your brain is like, we’ve been out of the groove for two months. Your brain is coming up with way more bullshit than just actually doing something.
Ryan: You dug that deep hole, and nobody gave you a shovel or a ladder to get out.
Maggie: And you’re in the hole, and the ladder, and it’s so deep. And it’s really the fact of that, the real thing that you’re overcoming every time you stop with an intention to start again is all the bullshit. All the shaming that you do that you stopped, all the shaming and guilt that you give yourself that you have to start again, that you did this again, that you have to restart again. That’s way more painful than just putting the food that you wrote on your plan in your mouth. It’s so much more painful.
So we’re going to start shrinking down the stop times. We’re going to make those shorter and shorter. We’re going to keep going. And we’re going to keep showing up. And that’s just going to be my mission. It’s my mission year round 365 anyways, but that’s what’s going to be the focus. I want to help people start the new year off on the absolute best right foot, teaching them step by step the exact process that I used to lose 90 pounds after two babies. That’s what we’re going to be doing.
Ryan: Enrolment closes on Monday the 3rd.
Maggie: Okay. We’re making decisions right now.
Ryan: And again I know we said this last episode but you’re closing for a while this time.
Maggie: Yeah. Don’t sleep on it just because you’re feeling doubtful of yourself. If you really feel you’re constantly going back and forth of should I join, shouldn’t I join. The only reason you’re considering not joining is just because of your doubt that you’ll follow through. Or that you doubt that this will be the thing that works or whatever. It’s only because of your self-doubt. Vibe Club is going to help you with your self-doubt.
Ryan: I think there’s a lot of doubt of people thinking they’re going to be able to do the work too.
Maggie: Yeah. And you absolutely will be able to because Vibe Club meets you where you’re at. I don’t make you squeeze yourself into this…
Ryan: Would you say it’s a lot of work?
Maggie: The most work you’ll do is on your brain and all the bullshit you tell yourself about it. But no, it’s not. And it gets easier and easier, but most people are stopping before it gets easier. There is a theme here, your problem is stopping. My solution is we’re going to stop stopping. And that solution is going to be taught in Vibe Club. So join if you feel called to join. That’s all we’re going to say about that. So let’s talk about blanket statements when you’re trying to lose weight. And then the solution to blanket statements.
Ryan: I know what a blanket statement is but give me some examples of some blanket statements in weight loss.
Maggie: I’m so glad you asked. I’m so glad you asked for examples because I have two that have come up literally within the last three days. So let’s see what’s the first one. The first one is, I started working out again, very excited about that. I have had some sciatica weird butt pain, the butt muscle. And I feel it a little bit right now but I’m going to just solve that problem if it gets really bad. I’ll go to a physical therapist, it’s very important to me to be – I’m getting ripped in 2022, that’s just what I’m going to do.
But I started working out again and I worked out three times. All three of those times that I worked out my weight went up the next day. And I have mental drama just like anybody else does, especially when you’re starting something new where you’re like, normally if I follow my plan I lose weight, everything works. But now I’m following my plan but I’m also adding in a new variable and now I’m not sure what this looks like. And what my brain is telling me is every time I work out I gain weight. I’m going to have to accept that I won’t lose weight for a while probably if I’m working out.
I worked out yesterday and my weight went down. So I made a blanket statement that was whenever I work out, and I work out three days a week. So I was thinking, okay, the scale will go up three days a week, it’ll follow the days that I work out. I’m trying to figure out, what’s my expectations here so I’m not driving myself crazy. So I made this blanket statement because it happened three times, guys, three times in a row. So that must make it absolutely 100% factual and this is just the reality of my life that I need to learn to accept.
Fourth time scale went down .8. That was one scenario where I was like, isn’t that interesting that my brain made this blanket statement and it felt very true. And I felt I had evidence. And I felt I had a lot of evidence when I really, I had three days of data. And that data was that the scale went up those three days.
Ryan: And can I point something out really quick before you move on to another example? That is not thought related but notice how you said, my weight went up. You did not say, my body fat went up.
Maggie: Yeah, I got, yeah, I put on fat. I put on fat every time I work out.
Ryan: You put on fat every time you work out. No, no one would ever say that. No one.
Maggie: Yeah. I think this is really applicable especially to women out there who are losing weight where your focus is so – and this will be the next podcast. We’re going to discuss redefining success. But weight loss isn’t always good. Weight loss isn’t always favorable. It’s not always what we’re going after. It’s not what always tells the whole story. So pay attention to that. If you have big poop or you drained a lot of water out of your body that may be weight loss but is that what we’re after? You know what I mean, is that what we’re going for?
We have to also start thinking in terms of body composition where we want fat loss. And when you freak out because you ate sushi, and your scale went up two pounds the next day because your weight went up. The truth of that is your water retention went up temporarily. And if you can slow down enough to be like, I did not gain two pounds of fat overnight. And I know you guys hear me say this because I know we say this stuff a lot. And you’re like, “Yeah, yeah, it’s just water weight, it’s just water weight.” Most of us, we don’t care. It doesn’t matter. Weight is up.
Ryan: I’ve got to see that number go down.
Maggie: Yeah, I’ve got to see it go down. The only way I can know that things are working and going in the right direction is if that scale has a lower number. You’ve got to stop. You’ve got to be honest.
Ryan: Have some more data points. I’ve said this before. Measure your waist.
Maggie: Ryan, we’re going to get to it, okay?
Ryan: Okay, okay, okay.
Maggie: Okay. The next one. I weighed in, that is so funny because if I didn’t do the work that I do, and if I didn’t teach this day in and day out, this shit would have slipped right past me. I get on the scale. My brain sees this number and goes, I am so sick of seeing this number. I’ve been seeing this number for months. You guys are going to die when you get the facts of this story because what I’m telling you right now is my brain’s story. My brain sees the number and it goes, so sick of this, I’ve been seeing this number for months.
And I was like that kind of shit, that doesn’t slip by me anymore, no, not at all. So I was like, “We’re going to look at the data.” And guess what, I’m really glad that I have the data because I weigh in all the time. So I start going back to my data. I see the number, that’s fine, recently, very recently. But then I keep scrolling, and scrolling, and scrolling, and scrolling. You guys, I scrolled back to July was the last time I saw this number, July. Do you know when I’ve been seeing this number? In the last seven days.
In the last seven days I’ve seen it four times. I have not been seeing it for months. I have been seeing it what feels like a lot in the last week.
Ryan: Why would your brain make up a story like that?
Maggie: Because my brain kept seeing it and the frustration of being like, go down, give me just the next one down, we’re ready to go into the next number. My brain was just like it was the frustration. It was the frustration of being like, this keeps happening. This shouldn’t be happening. I shouldn’t keep seeing this number. I’m seeing it nonstop. I’m sick of seeing it. All of those could be substories. But ultimately it was like I’ve been seeing this number for a month, I’m so sick of seeing this number. Guys, that was not true.
That was not the fact. And I had the facts. I had the facts because I tracked the data. So those were the two that have happened in the last week where I’ve been like, it is so fascinating what we leave up to our brain to remember and give back to us. Of how are things going with the scale? Your brain goes, you’re stuck. You’re stalled out. We’ve seen this number for months. You can’t break it. You’re at a plateau. And none of that is true but it felt really true for me because my brain in its short term memory had seen this number so many times, if so many is four.
It’s seen this number so many times in the last week that my brain was just blowing it up into something that was completely not factual. And if I didn’t have the data I would have believed it. I wouldn’t have known any better. I wouldn’t have been able to counter it in any way because I wouldn’t have known. I would have just been able to be like – and this is what happens when I’m coaching people. It feels really true. That’s fine but that doesn’t mean that it is true. That just means that you believe it really hard. That means it hasn’t been investigated.
That means we haven’t done some introspection on is this true or not and do we want to keep believing that I’m stuck and plateaued and stalled, and been at this for months? Especially when that is a false memory. It’s a false reality. It’s a lie.
Ryan: So your data helped you out of that story?
Maggie: 100%. I was so grateful that I had the data. Of course the data with the – are these both scale related? Yeah, they’re both scale related. And the other data just came from the fact that I did do really good thought work on that. I just thought, okay, Maggie, you want to lose fat and you want to gain muscle. What happens when you lose and gain at the same time?
What should we expect when you’re losing and gaining at the same time? We can expect that it’s not just going to be down, down, down on the scale. We can expect that there may be a bit more loss and balance, loss and balance, loss, and balance. So why don’t we just – and I was able to make this decision really quick and I told Ryan. I said, “I decided that if it takes six months for me to see the drop on the scale that I want, showing that there’s been fat loss and I know that I’m following my plan and I know that I’m working out three days a week, I’m okay with that.”
I’ll give myself six months. How many of you guys tell yourself, I’ll give myself six months to find a perfect protocol for me? I’ll give myself six months to figure out how to moderate carbs. No, you give yourself one.
Ryan: Absolutely not.
Maggie: One time. And I overate, now, see, I can’t have any carbs. See, I can’t eat sugar. And I really want to invite you to open yourself out to trying out anything for a minimum of six months. I made peace with that so quick. I’m like, six months, six months will pass. It will be June in no time. Six months, easy, I can commit to six months of literally being like, let’s say we stay at this exact same weight for six months. I’m okay with that because I know I’m doing what I need to do. I’m following my plan and I’m moving my body.
Ryan: And can I also just touch on data points really quick?
Maggie: Yes, let’s talk about data.
Ryan: If your goal is fat loss and whether you’re exercising or not, please do not rely on just the scale. You should be taking measurements. And for me personally I put so much more emphasis and value on what my measurements and saying than what the scale is saying because I have evidence that the scale is not accurate of my progress.
Maggie: And your DEXA scan.
Maggie: Just remind them of that one more time because that’s one of my goals with everything I’m doing right now. I will go get a DEXA scan and it will tell me information that is amazing that the scale could never tell me. So yours lost, what was the deal?
Ryan: My DEXA scan, I lost 26 pounds of fat, but I gained 14 pounds of muscle. So if I was going off of body weight.
Maggie: How much did I lose?
Ryan: I would have lost 12 or 14 pounds.
Maggie: And that would have been such a bummer in a year or whatever.
Ryan: But it was actually 26 pounds of loss.
Maggie: Fat loss.
Ryan: Fat loss.
Maggie: The loss that we’re after, which is the fat, not the weight.
Ryan: I lift heavy ass weights, I put on a lot of muscle. And just standing on a scale, it doesn’t tell you that.
Maggie: And this is going to be very applicable to those of you who are eating keto and low carb. When you see a major drop on the scale, especially in the beginning or especially with a restart, you’re seeing water. You’re seeing water. And I’m not saying that it doesn’t feel good to get nine pounds of water weight off your body, of course.
Ryan: It feels amazing.
Maggie: But when things inevitably level out and balance out to what they’re supposed to be on a fat loss journey, that’s the norm, not your seven pounds that you lost in the first week. We have to be honest, when it’s a water loss, or a I was backed up loss, or a water gain, or I’m backed up gain, there are other reasons why your weight may go up or may go down. And we need to be realistic about all of it. And that includes I did not gain three pounds of fat overnight, that didn’t happen.
However, often you need to remind yourself of that when you’re like, “The scale is up, the scale is up, the scale is up. I’m going backwards. I’m sliding back.” No, I ate something, and I retained more water, that’s all that’s happened. And if I don’t quit, if I don’t stop right now this will come off within days, 24, 48, 72 hours max if you don’t screw yourself.
Ryan: It’s so funny how weight loss is 99% a mental game.
Maggie: Yeah. I mean it’s 100% a mental game.
Ryan: That’s what this podcast church is all about. But when you actually sit back and look at all of these little moments like we are right now, of this blanket statement. You really realize how much of it is mental. And how that’s the root cause and the root problem of all of your results.
Maggie: Well, let’s talk about how these could have gone whack, if we’re going to talk about them. Number one, I get on the scale, it says the same number and I say, “This number has been happening forever, I’m never going to break past this.” If I hadn’t done what I do and what I teach my clients to do. If I hadn’t done the thought work, if I haven’t examined – and if I hadn’t looked for the freaking truth, what I would have done, could have done, may have done in the past.
Restricted my food, gone on a fast, done something drastic, done something because I need to bust past this plateau. The plateau that was a lie. So this is why it’s mental because I had two roads to travel. I could do the one where I’m like, time to bust through this by doing things that aren’t sustainable. Or time to find the truth and figure out how I’m going to be consistent and continue no matter what. Those were my two paths. I picked the one that served me and guess what? The scale dropped.
I’m not at that weight anymore. I don’t know if I even said that. So that one was solved. And then what was the other one? Working out. Every time I work out the scale goes up. In the past I have stopped working out for that reason because I was so invested in the weight going down. Yes, I’ve had a very, very unhealthy relationship to weight and weight loss for sure, I would stop. That was the option I had too. What do I to get over the fact that the scale goes up? Eat less. Eat less on my workout days.
What you think determines what you do. And what I thought, helped me do the thing that served me the most, the thing that got the scale to freaking move. The thing that got the scale to move after it had shown me the same weight for four days and the thing that got the scale to move even though I had just added in working out. So that’s why it’s mental you guys because you always have two paths that you can take. One of them is going to help you to keep going and stop stopping.
And one of them is going to get you to do something that is so unnecessary that you inevitably stop. And then you screw yourself and then you have to do the – you’ve got to do the lawnmower. And you’ve got to get the engine back up and running and you have to use 10x effort to try to get your ass moving and get yourself back into a groove that you’ve taken yourself out of. That’s why it’s mental. That’s why it matters what you think because that’s going to determine your next steps.
And a lot of people, their next step is immediate self-sabotage. I am frustrated so I’m going to eat. Eating never helped a scale that wouldn’t budge ever. Overeating is never going to help that. It’s top priority. That’s how you burn fat with your brain, you guys. The burning fat really does happen, but it starts with what you’re thinking. It starts with what you choose to believe. And the data tracking, track the scale data. Track your habits data. And I teach all of this in Vibe Club. And track your measurements.
And the next episode, it’s very important to me because I really want to talk about redefining success. So make sure that you listen to next week’s episode. But you’ve got to be tracking more than the scale and then beyond that you have got to be honest with yourself. I’m coaching a lot and teaching a lot, and there are things that come up a lot. And one of them is the inability that most of us have to tell ourselves the truth about what’s real, about what’s factual, about what’s actually happening or going on.
It’s all stories. It’s all old stuff and it needs to be investigated if you want to alter your course and stop driving yourself crazy in your head.
Ryan: Happy New Year, let’s go.
Maggie: Happy New Year, guys, let’s go.
Ryan: See you.